The following manners apply to anyplace where large groups of people gather to consume food that they packed themselves: be it cafeteria, break room, or public park.
Upon entering a room in which someone is eating an orange, one should never exclaim, “I smell Oranges!” This just serves to show everyone how unobservant and rude you are. This will also result in the Orange eater not offering you any. Instead you should casually glance around until you locate the orange eater and then casually approach them. Begin the conversation thusly, “Why I see that you have chosen to eat an orange today. I can tell that you care about your health very much because oranges are high in vitamin C and are a tasty way to ward off many nasty diseases such as scurvy.” Then go on to explain that you have recently returned from a long sea voyage and that you fear you yourself might be suffering the early stages of Scurvy and that you would be forever grateful if they might share part of their life-preserving fruit.
Always pack a book in your lunch bag. First of all, it is brain food and will make your diet more complete. Secondly, it will help to comfort you after you realize that no one in the lunch room is eager for you to sit with them. If however, you actually want to read your book while you eat do not sit at a table with women. They will talk incessantly though not to you.
If you want to eat without having hate-filled stares shot at you do not sit at the Clique table. The Clique table is the table closest to the doors so that the Clique can judge everyone who comes in to eat. The Clique will be almost entirely women and they will be talking loudly and about things of little importance. If you remembered your book sit as far away as possible. If you forgot it sit one table over and eavesdrop.
The rules for Popcorn are different from that of Oranges. Forget it no one shares Popcorn. You can exclaim that you smell popcorn all you like because the buttery goodness is all mine.
Take your change from the vending machine because no one is going to announce that they found an extra quarter. Like wise don’t feel guilty about pocketing an extra quarter because chances are that the machine is the one that messed up and spit out that extra money in order to make up for all of the times it ate your change. Yea I can live with that story.
C. O. Bonham 
Weather Tis Vane to Comment
29 Nov 2011 7 Comments
by C.O. Bonham in Random Musing, Uncategorized, Well founded paranoia Tags: Blogging, Leaving Comments, Weather vanes
I was so excited when I first started getting comments on my blog but for some reason they were all in the spam pile. I am thinking, “What are all of these wonderful people who actually like my writing doing in the spam folder?” So I approved the comments and basked in the glow of positive feed back.
Then I looked closely at where the comments came from. Most of them seemed to be just regular blogs like mine. But they all had the word Weathervane in the title.
So I said ohhh kaaay and forgot it. Then recently I got some twelve or so comments in my spam folder at one time. They appeared to be from different people but when I clicked on them they all linked back to the same website. A website that sells weather vanes.
So I ask: Why is it that the only people who read my blog are Weathervane enthusiasts?
Am I prejudice against Weather Vanes?
No. Weather Vanes are both decorative and functional. But you can’t blame me for seeing some kind of conspiracy. Can you?
Sorry if I offended anyone who left a genuine comment and honestly enjoyed my random musings.
This just happens to be what I’m musing on right now, though something tells me that this anything but random. I think that there might be a method behind the spam filter’s madness.
So please by all means leave a comment. Feel free to praise my opinions or even disagree if you feel you must.
For right now I am going to leave the settings alone so that I can continue to either approve or disapprove comments.
I also realize that I am not very good at replying to comments. Sometimes though it is really hard to know what to say.
So here are a few comment guidelines that will get you approved and maybe even get a reply:
1) Say something about the subject of the post that you are commenting on. Do you agree/disagree? Did you think that it was clever/lame/too clever by half? What is your opinion?
2) Do not ask me tech questions. I am not a blogging guru. I am not good with the technical stuff; I just type and post that’s it. I have no Idea what an RSS feed is.
3) Try to avoid having anything to do with weather vanes. I am on to you. (If you do have the misfortune of having a weathervane related site please pay close attention to point one. That should get you accepted.
4) Don’t try selling anything. I might let through a recommendation but never a blatant ad.
And lastly
If you really want me to reply to your comment you need to engage my interest. Have I met you before? Did you hear about me through Cross and Cosmos? Do you have an opinion on the post topic? Does the post remind you of a book you read once? A TV show? Movie? I am more likely to reply to a reader who is engaged in the subject than one who just says, “I never thought about it that way before.” My opinion on the topic is already in the post so I guess I figure, “what else can I say?”
I hope that helps. Again sorry if I sounded mean that really wasn’t my intention. But maybe these few suggestions will help you decide whether ‘t would be vain to comment or not.
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