You Might Be Home Schooled If . . .

They say that imitation is the sincerest from of flattery.  I hope you feel very flattered Mr. Foxworthy.

You might have been home schooled if . . .

  • You went into Shock the day you found out that your mother was not the great repository of all human knowledge.
  • You took so many “field trips” to Wal-mart that people thought you worked there.
  • You had to total the cost of all of the groceries in the cart plus tax (showing your work) before you could get M&M’s at the checkout counter.
  • You have more reverence for an Author’s birthday than a Catholic has for a Saint’s day.
  • Other people scream and throw holy water on you when you tell them that your School didn’t have sports.
  • You discovered the cure for Red neck in second grade using everyday kitchen staples.
  • People in town shun you when they learn that you don’t worship the local football team.
  • When someone asks you if you know of AC/DC you reply “Why yes of course these are the two forms of electricity. Alternating current and Direct current. While Alternating current is the best for sending through wires into your outlets Direct current is actually used to run most household appliances.” The person stares at you and then walks away as if you had deeply offended their religion.
  • Upon learning about pep rallies you laugh and exclaim, “Really! People do that? That is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.”
  • When someone asks you your favorite sport you reply, “Speed reading.”

And lastly:

  • If you are outside on a warm September day and there are no other kids around then you might be Home Schooled.